Roots fans and owners, it’s game day! Forget about the form the last few weeks, our big guns are back, Tulsa had to fly a long way to be here, and also the Roots might as well win, right? Right? As a treat? The Roots host FC Tulsa at 7:00 p.m. at Pioneer Stadium on the campus of CSU East Bay, which will be their home for the rest of this season and the next season.
FC Tulsa
FC Tulsa were founded in 2013, joining USL for the 2015 season. They were founded as the Tulsa Roughnecks, an homage to a 70s/80s NASL Team.
Both of these crests absolutely kick ass. Pure NFL-style logos. This crest, however:
This crest has a “who is John Galt?” sticker on its Tesla and is curious whether the flag has fringes. It just doesn’t trust the government (note: mistrust does not apply to police violence).
The current owners of FC Tulsa are named J.W., Ryan, and Kyle, and technically have enough brothers for a quorum to extend bids at the end of rush. Their fucking website mentions that one went to Yale and two went to Notre Dame.
“Bespoke typeface.” I guess I have to give them the benefit of the doubt on Tulsa’s “vernacular signage,” a thing that you cannot make me care about. It seems like a wasted opportunity to call one color “Patina Green” and the others just “White” and “Gold.” Like they might as well just call them “blank” and “brown-ish.” Also it’s a little funny that there’s no Patina Green in the crest itself, but they didn’t know where else to tell you that that’s their accent color. In other news, the scissor-tailed flycatcher is the bird on the box of Wingspan where it’s worth 8 points and on activation gives all players a worm token. More like the scissor-tailed eyecatcher!
[editor’s note: Bloom has been sacked. The rest of this article was written by a generative AI that we programmed with better writing from Deadspin circa 2008-2011].
Ahead of the 2022 USL Championship season, FC Tulsa inked a landmark multi-year partnership with PUMA, joining clubs such as Manchester City FC, Borussia Dortmund, and AC Milan in partnering with PUMA.
https://www.fctulsa.com/about-fc-tulsa/
“Ahead of the 2022 USL Championship season, Rootsblog inked a landmark multi-year partnership with WordPress, joining publications such as Slate, Wired, and the Huffington Post in partnering with WordPress.”
Around the Western Conference
Don’t look at the table right now. The results last weekend were overall fine for the Roots other than their own, but I’m going to try not to look again until the Roots get a win, and maybe not even then! I suggest you do the same.
Tulsa’s Form
Tulsa had five wins in a row in late June and most of July, although all against relatively bad teams. Immediately before that run they had three straight losses, and since that run they are 1-2-5. Two weeks ago they beat San Antonio 2-1. God damn, how’d they pull that off?
Lol the first goal. A tame shot from Eric Bird medium range that the keeper saves, but it spills out and then rolls in behind him. Neither of the other two goals are all that interesting, except that the San Antonio consolation goal looked very offside to me and most of the Tulsa defenders.
This past weekend they drew 0-0 against Phoenix, because Juan Guerra. The teams combined for five shots on target, so no, I will not be sharing highlights.
Roots’ Form
Absolutely not. It’s not going to make you happy.
Per John Morrissey, the Roots score 0.9 more goals per game with Tamacas in the team than without. I hope that the Roots bring Tamacas back next year, but we need to hope that Njie can do the job when Tamacas is out, because Prentice has not.
Players to Watch
Phillip Goodrum # 10 – Goodrum had a great(rum) 2022, and thought he’d earned a move out of USL, but Memphis couldn’t get a deal done, so Goodrum through a fit and forced a move to… Tulsa! who are 9th, outside the playoffs, and four spots/nine points behind Memphis, who have a game in hand. Goodrum has nine goals in eighteen appearances for Tulsa, not a bad haul.
Marcus Epps # 7 – This is not the Marcus Epps who is under contract with the Las Vegas Raiders of Paradise. This Marcus Epps was drafted out of USF by the Philadelphia Union, but never quite cracked the highest level, and has moved around USL programs, most recently Phoenix. At USF, Epps played with Lindo Mfeka (usually it’s Mfeka’s time at Reno that ends up getting him mentioned as a former teammate of a player to watch, but man, he comes up a lot here). Epps is probably a forward or something, given his 8 goals.
Lineup and Score Predictions
Bloom
I think Jon’s lineup prediction is correct. It’s the lineup I would want to see, as well (although I’m ambivalent on Koze/Napo over Gomez right now).
Roots have to win this one. They are bad at doing that at home, and are especially prone to playing down to competition there. Still, there are many available marbles, and the Roots are playing for those. Noah got the boys up when it was absolutely necessary last year. It’s getting to be that time again. 2-0 Roots.
Jon
With Tarek Morad and Danny Gomez ruled out, I have Neveal Hackshaw returning the CB spot and Napo Matsoso pairing with Irakoze Donasiyano. Other than that, no surprises. As for my score prediction, I’m going with a 3-1 Oakland victory, getting back on track for the final stretch.
Aaron
First of all, MMMBop fucking slaps and I have long been confused about why the song hasn’t had a renaissance. Same goes for Savage Garden’s I Want You. Also, apologies for the lack of podcast this week. We were working out the conflict-of-interest issues involved with fractional ownership in a special purpose vehicle with limited voting rights that are to be exercised by someone we’ve never met.
About the game: If I were in charge of the Roots this week, I would be making as many changes as I possibly could. Obviously there are some roster limitations to making 11 changes, and also Paul can do no wrong. But I think you can make 9 changes. Might have to do a wholesale line change at 45 minutes, or maybe even like 20 minutes into the first half, but a message might need to be sent. Hackshaw and Tamacas returning should be a huge boon. Hopefully its enough. 2-1 Roots.